Family Dynamics that Can Affect Motivation
The following recommendations were compiled by members of the Parent Institute Committee of the Office of Gifted Education and Curriculum Development. They are based on the experiences of educators and parents of gifted students in Virginia Beach City Public Schools.
Parents can support the development of a gifted child in a number of ways. Some of the most important ways include the following:
1. Provide both support and structure. Gifted students need as much care as other students. They also need to have a clear sense of structure, behavioral expectations, and limitations.
2. Give your gifted child an avenue to express her curiosity. We need to admit pretty early on that we cannot answer all of the questions a gifted child raises. So, help her learn to investigate and research on her own. Insist on high-quality research and investigations for more complex problems. Question conclusions if she draws them from only one perspective. You can get support and guidance in your efforts by consulting with a gifted resource teacher or gifted teacher.
3. Respond to questions, comments, insights, and observations from your gifted child with responses that support elaboration and critical thinking skills.
4. Help your gifted child manage the emotional intensity of some of his reactions. For example, some students should avoid things like the evening news until they are emotionally mature enough to watch. They may be able to fully comprehend the impact of what they hear on a deep level without the emotional tools to cope with the full import of that understanding.
5. Celebrate your child’s giftedness. This does not mean that a gifted child has more rights than anyone else or is inherently better than anyone else. On the other hand, there is no reason to deny, diminish, or apologize for a child’s gift.
6. Support your child's socialization and her differences. Help her accept that fitting-in is not always going to be possible. Fitting-in may not even be desirable if it means accepting the values of peers who are dismissive or disparaging about the value of a quality education or scholarly accomplishment. When possible, provide your child with opportunities to socialize with peers who are achievement oriented about their education.
7. Learn about self-efficacy to help your child learn to seek challenges and persist when faced with obstacles.
8. Develop collaborative relationships with your child’s teachers. Share insights about your child with the teacher while being ready to listen and learn from the teacher.
9. Advocate for your child’s education. Be aware of myths such as gifted children can always succeed without support or differentiated instruction. It is critical for gifted students to be cognitively and academically challenged. Virginia Beach City Public Schools is committed to differentiating instruction in ways that provide challenge to all students.
Investigate Further
Parents can support the development of a gifted child in a number of ways. Some of the most important ways include the following:
1. Provide both support and structure. Gifted students need as much care as other students. They also need to have a clear sense of structure, behavioral expectations, and limitations.
2. Give your gifted child an avenue to express her curiosity. We need to admit pretty early on that we cannot answer all of the questions a gifted child raises. So, help her learn to investigate and research on her own. Insist on high-quality research and investigations for more complex problems. Question conclusions if she draws them from only one perspective. You can get support and guidance in your efforts by consulting with a gifted resource teacher or gifted teacher.
3. Respond to questions, comments, insights, and observations from your gifted child with responses that support elaboration and critical thinking skills.
4. Help your gifted child manage the emotional intensity of some of his reactions. For example, some students should avoid things like the evening news until they are emotionally mature enough to watch. They may be able to fully comprehend the impact of what they hear on a deep level without the emotional tools to cope with the full import of that understanding.
5. Celebrate your child’s giftedness. This does not mean that a gifted child has more rights than anyone else or is inherently better than anyone else. On the other hand, there is no reason to deny, diminish, or apologize for a child’s gift.
6. Support your child's socialization and her differences. Help her accept that fitting-in is not always going to be possible. Fitting-in may not even be desirable if it means accepting the values of peers who are dismissive or disparaging about the value of a quality education or scholarly accomplishment. When possible, provide your child with opportunities to socialize with peers who are achievement oriented about their education.
7. Learn about self-efficacy to help your child learn to seek challenges and persist when faced with obstacles.
8. Develop collaborative relationships with your child’s teachers. Share insights about your child with the teacher while being ready to listen and learn from the teacher.
9. Advocate for your child’s education. Be aware of myths such as gifted children can always succeed without support or differentiated instruction. It is critical for gifted students to be cognitively and academically challenged. Virginia Beach City Public Schools is committed to differentiating instruction in ways that provide challenge to all students.
Investigate Further
To review some ideas for nurturing gifts and talents open the link above. This link provides more recommendations for responses to family dynamics concerns that affect the development of your gifted child.
The link above provides responses to family dynamics concerns that can lead to underachievement with your gifted child.
References
About.com. (2013). Nurturing gifts and talents. Retrieved from the About.com Online Web site: http://giftedkids.about.com/od/nurturinggiftsandtalents/Nurturing_Gifts_and_Talents.htm
The Critical Thinking Community. (2011). Retrieved from The Critical Thinking Online Web site: http://www.criticalthinking.org/pages/for-students/610
Cross, T.L. (2005). The social and emotional lives of gifted kids: Understanding and guiding their development. Prufrock Press. Waco, TX.
Dweck, C. (2006). Mindset: The New Psychology of Success. New York, NY: Ballantine Press.
Hooper, L. (2007). Expanding the Discussion Regarding Parentification and Its Varied Outcomes: Implications for Mental Health Research and Practice. Journal of Mental Health Counseling, 29,322-337.
Rimm, S. (1997). How to Parent So Children Will Learn. New York, NY: Three Rivers Press.
Rimm, S. (2007) Keys to parenting the gifted child: 3rd edition. Great Potential Press. Tuscon, AZ.
Siegle,D. & McCoach, B. Rubenstein, L.D. (2012). Understanding and Addressing Underachievement. In Gifted Students. In Cross, T. & Cross, J. (Eds.) Handbook for Counselors Serving Students with Gifts and Talents (pp. 511-528) Waco, TX: Prufrock Press Inc.
Walker, S.Y. (1991) The survival guide for parents of gifted kids: How to understand, live with, and stick up for your gifted child. Free Spirit Publishing, Minneapollis, MN.
Webb, J., Meckstroth, A.M. & Tolan, S. Guiding the gifted child: A practical source for parents and teachers. Great Potential Press. Tuscon, AZ.
The Critical Thinking Community. (2011). Retrieved from The Critical Thinking Online Web site: http://www.criticalthinking.org/pages/for-students/610
Cross, T.L. (2005). The social and emotional lives of gifted kids: Understanding and guiding their development. Prufrock Press. Waco, TX.
Dweck, C. (2006). Mindset: The New Psychology of Success. New York, NY: Ballantine Press.
Hooper, L. (2007). Expanding the Discussion Regarding Parentification and Its Varied Outcomes: Implications for Mental Health Research and Practice. Journal of Mental Health Counseling, 29,322-337.
Rimm, S. (1997). How to Parent So Children Will Learn. New York, NY: Three Rivers Press.
Rimm, S. (2007) Keys to parenting the gifted child: 3rd edition. Great Potential Press. Tuscon, AZ.
Siegle,D. & McCoach, B. Rubenstein, L.D. (2012). Understanding and Addressing Underachievement. In Gifted Students. In Cross, T. & Cross, J. (Eds.) Handbook for Counselors Serving Students with Gifts and Talents (pp. 511-528) Waco, TX: Prufrock Press Inc.
Walker, S.Y. (1991) The survival guide for parents of gifted kids: How to understand, live with, and stick up for your gifted child. Free Spirit Publishing, Minneapollis, MN.
Webb, J., Meckstroth, A.M. & Tolan, S. Guiding the gifted child: A practical source for parents and teachers. Great Potential Press. Tuscon, AZ.